My Daily Routine!

6:25 A.M. - First Alarm of a sequence of alarms and first curse of a sequence of curses.

6:35 A.M. – Imagine a world without clocks and alarms.

6:40 A.M. - Remember the horrible face of the Boss and wake up.

6:45 A.M. – Sitting in the loo think how beautiful it would be if one could sleep again.

6:55 A.M. – Ah! Flush!!

7:00 A.M.– While bathing, try and struggle reaching all parts of the body.

7:15 A.M. – Smell the shirt (make a ‘who-cares’ face), remember the boss’s secretary (make a ‘I do care’ face) and put a lot of perfume.

7:30 A.M. – Re-evaluate the face in the mirror. Smile a little. Think something on the lines of ‘You-

Handsome-Little-Thing’ or ‘Perfect-10’.

7:45 A.M. – Board the bus and start shaking. Rub the hips with strangers (all men).

8:10 A.M. – Reach the office and remove the clutter from previous days.

8:20 A.M. – Have a delicious south Indian breakfast (Idly and sambhar, dosa and sambhar or vada and sambhar). Remember mom and aloo parathas (with parathas in prominence).

9:00 A.M. – Walk infront of boss’s office, make a silent prayer, give a weak smile to the secretary (who winks as if this is going to be the best day in the world) and go inside.

NOTE: In general interest I am not writing the constitutionally incorrect language that my boss uses for the next half an hour after which his wife (presumably) calls him and he makes a gesture with hand that I chose to interpret as dismissed.

9:30 A.M. – Emerge from the office with nothing to say to secretary who looks expectantly for a little gossip.

10:00 A.M. – Imagine the boss drowning in his own tea cup and various other violent things causing possible hazards to him.

12:00 Noon – Go for lunch. Eat rice and sambhar and wonder why I was ever born.

12:30 P.M. – Talk to girlfriend, listen to how her make-up went all wrong today and discuss why Loreal is a better brand than Garnier.

1:00 P.M. – Try to imagine a girlfriend-without-misery. Impossible to even imagine.

1:15 P.M. – Stop imagining and return to reality. Analyze the pending work.

1:30 P.M. – Chat with friends how Rajasthan should suck at IPL.

3:00 P.M. – Try not to fall asleep out of complete boredom.

3:20 P.M. – Enjoy the free coffee and samosa and discuss how the company should provide free kachori as well.

4:00 P.M. The wait begins.

5:00 P.M. The wait ends. Leave the office.

5:30 P.M. Start shaking in the bus again.

6:00 P.M. Sleep.

8:30 P.M. Have dinner (something with sambhar). Wish there were no taste buds in the tongue anymore.

9:00 P.M. Start writing the blog no one reads.

11:00 P.M. Wish it was Sunday tomorrow and sleep.